#newyearnewme!

Barf.

Make some damn ice cream. This one ought to wake you up from any pipe dreams you might have that you’ll be able to subsist on kale, quinoa, and good vibes for the next 12 months.

Happy New Year, kids.

• 2 cups heavy cream
• 1 cup whole milk
• ¾ cup dark brown sugar
• ¼ cup (1 oz/28 grams) freshly ground good coffee (medium roast preferred)
• ⅛ teaspoon cinnamon
• A pinch of xanthan gum
• A pinch of salt
• 1 tablespoon bourbon

In a saucepan, heat the cream, milk, and brown sugar until it simmers and all the sugar has completely dissolved, then remove from the heat.

In a French press, add the freshly ground coffee, then pour the hot cream and sugar mixture over it. Let sit with the sieve on top (to keep the heat in) for about half an hour to let the coffee brew directly into the cream base. Push the sieve down, straining the grounds away from the cream base, then pour the base into a large bowl. Discard the grounds. Whisk in the cinnamon, xantham gum, salt, and bourbon until thoroughly incorporated. Chill overnight or until completely cool.

Churn the chilled coffee base in an ice cream maker in accordance to the machine’s instructions. When the mixture resembles soft serve, remove it from the ice cream maker (quickly!) and place it into an airtight container with a layer of plastic wrap to keep even more air out, as well as to prevent ice crystals from forming on the top of your ice cream. Chill in the freezer overnight, or until the mixture sets.

Yields almost 4 cups of ice cream. You decide how many servings that is.